Tag Archives: Andie

Fabio Wants You to Eat Pizza

Mama Mia! Look what I just found on YumSugar.com! Grocery Hags’ favorite Italian schmoozer is apparently shilling frozen pizzas.

Dr. Oetker, one of Europe’s top frozen pizza brands, is launching its Ristorante line in America, and has called on the reality TV personality to be the spokesperson for the thin-crust pizza. “We feel Fabio is the perfect voice for the brand,” Dr. Oetker USA said in a statement. “He has an incredible personality and a real passion for cooking.”

I don’t know if I’ll buy frozen pizza (in New York?! please) just because Fabs’ face is on the box, but I may try it. You know…because why not? It may make a good blog entry. Maybe we’ll hear more about this at the reunion spesh tonight? CARLA FOR FAN FAVORITE!

WORST. FINALE. EVER!!!

Wow….247 people have already checked this blog for our reaction to last night’s Top Chef, and its not even 10am! I guess you really care what we have to say. That, or you’re just as PISSED as we are and you’re looking for a place to vent. Either way, I think we all agree that the only possible reaction to last night’s Top Chef is: WHAT THE FUCK!?!??!

Never in my life have I been so unhappy at a Final episode of a series.  NEVER. Even the Sopranos ended better than this. My trust/love/respect for this show is shot to hell, truly. It’s been nearly 12 hours and I’m still angry. Mother Trucker!

Oh, you mean some of you don’t know? Ok: The idiot gap toothed baldie bear jerk , with the help of  Top Chef Season 4’s far superior Richard Blais, beat Carla and Stefan for the title.  The judges loved his venison…they loved his red snapper app…they thought his only mistake was serving meat instead of a sweet for his final course, but they loved the damn meat, so they forgave it! And Carla totally bombed. And Stefan shot himself in the foot with this dessert Padma so hilariously described as “Pedestrian at best.” HA! The one bright spot in the show, for me anyway. Padma is so stupid. Anyway…

It just kills me how Casey, Carla’s sous chef, came back and, in her one chance to redeem herself from her shotty showing at her own Top Chef Finale episode in season 3, she COMPLETELY recreated the exact scenario she was in 2 years ago: a strong contender who coulda gone all the way doesn’t cook what she knows how to cook and she ends up in a distant 3rd. So sad.

What killed me is how upset she was.  Carla – what did you learn when cooking for Wylie Dufrense? Jacques Pepin? Freakin  ERIC RIPERt? You succeed when you cook your food!! C’mon, there’s no Love in Sous Vide meat! You don’t do sous Vide meat! And why would you not make a tart!? The judges LOVE your tarts! Seriously Carla: I am so dissapointed.

But you know what? We still love you, HOOTIE – FOREVER! And I’m putting my money on Carla being Fan Favorite next week at the reunion. Screw Fabio. Yes – I said that.

It really sucks that the judges based their final decision on one meal instead of the competition as a whole (especially since they so obviously gave Stefan a pass in order for him to get into the finals) but that’s the TC policy since day one, weather we like it or not, and that’s why this guy is now “Top Chef,”

hosea

And why I have to go barf now.

Please comment and share your angry rants with us. We need to bond together in times like this. Its not healthy to go through these tough moments alone. To quote Harvey Milk, “I KNOW YOU’RE ANGRY! I’M ANGRY!!!!!” Let us heal together. In the comments.

To Mark Bittman, From the Great State of Texas

Dear Mr. Bittman,

I read the New York Times Dining Section on a weekly basis and enjoy most of the articles. And I usually enjoy your columns. Today’s for instance – I’ve been bored with my breakfast lately and your idea of polenta pizza with bacon seemed mighty tasty.

However once I got to page two of today’s article, I was shocked. SHOCKED. How could a food critic – one that is so well-traveled – describe my favorite meal, migas as the following:

Essentially stir-fried bread: Take 1/2-inch pieces of good whole wheat or rye and cook it in (lots of) olive oil with garlic, crumbled chorizo, or whatever else you like, until the bread is crisp.

Any self respecting Texan knows that this is incorrect information! Mr. Bittman, migas is DELICIOUS, greasy, certainly not healthy breakfast meal – most commonly eaten after a long night of drinking in Austin. It consists of the following:

1. Eggs
2. Beans
3. Salsa
4. Onions
5. Peppers (bell and jalepeno)
6. Tortilla Chips

Please get yourself down to Austin ASAP and visit one of the following: Trudy’s, Juan and a Million, El Arroyo, Taco Shack – I’m sure there are more. The commenters will fill in where my mind is blanking.

Love Always,
An Insulted Lone Star State

DC Celebs that Aren’t Obama

So the Grocery Hags took a lil trip to DC this weekend to have a reunion with their two favorite people. There was shopping, cooking, and of course eating, involved.

Once such eating adventure took us to a burger joint near the Eastern Market. Maybe you know the chef of Good Stuff Eatery?

Complete with Hat

Complete with Hat

Yep – Spike from TC4!!!! He was manning the grill where there was a special Inauguration weekend menu. I clearly had the Obama burger – with red onion marmalade, horseradish mayo, and blue cheese (red, white and blue – GET IT?!?! Not gonna lie…I didn’t at first). It was delish. And Allie enjoyed her Turkey Burger. Plus, fries come with dipping sauces other than ketchup / mustard – Allie loved the Old Bay mayo but I prefered the Chipotle one. Anyone who knows me knows my love of dip – they are key.

I gained a little more respect for Spike (I wasn’t a fan of his last season) while at this restaurant. I loved that he was there, manning the grill, posing for pictures (by our star-struck yet doesn’t really love TC friend), and wearing funny hats. And it’s a family owned place – his adorable father owns the restaurant and spends his days upstairs finding empty tables, cleaning up and generally being a happy camper. After we polished off everything on the table, we chatted with him a bit. Papa Mendelsohn was so proud of Spike and was thrilled when he decided to become a chef. However, Spike apparently didn’t tell the fam he was going to be on Top Chef until AFTER filming. Scandal?

Smell ya later 08

Every New Years Day, my mom makes a big pot of black eyed peas and makes everyone who enters our home take a spoonful. “For good luck!” she claims. When I was a kid (and hated anything that was remotely related to the word “vegetable” or “healthy”) I had to hold my nose and shut my eyes to make sure she understood how incredibly awful that ONE BITE was. Did I mention I was a stubborn brat as a child?

The only thing standing between you and a good 2009. Says Texas.

Now that I’m older, wiser, and actually like veggies, I’m aching for my mama’s good-luck black eyed peas. I’m so not in the mood to do it the old fashioned way – I only have a few hours! Luckily, YumSugar had a great slideshow of BEP recipes for those superstitious southerners like me.

Before we go out, I’m having friends come over for a cheapo dinner of pizza, wine, beer, and – because you can’t party without it – chips, salsa and guacamole. I think I’ll also make these so everyone can have a little luck before we head into 2009. I have most of the stuff already. And everyone MUST have a bite.

Happy New Years! Ya’ll be safe now.

Adventures in Baking

I’m not a baker. AT ALL. My mother does the baking and somehow, I missed that gene. I’m much more inclined to make something I can mess up and it will still turn out yummy where as baking is such a science (and science and I don’t play nicely together) – a little extra of something and it goes to crap!

But I got invited to a Hannukkah party this Sunday at the boy’s parent’s house and I want to bring something. I always (always always) bring a bottle of wine and want to mix it up!

Slashfood had a cookie recipe this week for some cookies that looked so fool proof even the science-flunking nonbaker that I am could possibly maybe handle it. I don’t even need a mixer! And just one bowl!

Is this an appropriate thing to bring? I feel like if someone is nice enough to stink up their house making latkes, I should strap on an apron and say thank you the proper way, right?

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Ya’ll bringing anything to a holiday party this weekend?

Connect the Dots

When I was little I danced like a maniac. I ran around in a tutu and was that annoying kid in the mall twirling around the racks. In current years I’ve replaced the dancing obsession with the all-things-food-cooking-and-eating obsession. And I used to think the two were unrelated.

And then this past Friday night, I went with some girlfriends to see NYC Ballet perform George Balanchine’s The Nutcracker and FINALLY realized that yes, there is a connection:

HELLO! After battling the mice Marie and the Nutcracker Prince travel to the LAND OF SWEETS to watch Spanish Hot Chocolate and Candy Canes and Mother Ginger (and her gingerbread children that live under her skirt) and a SUGAR PLUM fairy dance around and have a party! How could I not have developed a love for all things food when as a kid food was personified in dance form.

This musing brought to you by Monday morning.