Top 5 Smackdown

I have basically nothing to say about last night’s Top Chef. Well, nothing too snarky, anyway. I though it was a fantastic episode from start to finish. I loved the quickfire, especially the always deliciously nerdy Wylie Dufrense, in whose restaurant Ben and I celebrated our one year anniversary with Popcorn Soup, Waygu skirt steak, and foie gras. It was certainly the most uniquely yummy meal I’ve ever had, and I’ll never forget how nicely the staff treated us. I’m always happy to be properly waited on, particularly in New York. But I digress…

I also loved the Elimination Challenge: it was FABULOUS. It gave the chefs the chance to just cook something and cook it well. Plus, we at home got to play our own, “What would your last meal be?” game. Mine: Tex-Mex. Easy, no question. Chips and  fresh salsa, guacamole, tamales, rice and beans, I’m happy. That, or pepperoni pizza. And Mac&Cheese. Damn! Other picks I heard: fillet Mignon, ribs, and biscuits & sausage gravy. mmmmmmm

The standout last night, and for the past couple of nights was, OBVIOUSLY, Carla. 

First she made a great looking take on “Green Eggs & Ham”, and then she rocked the Elimination Challenge with Squab and Peas…of all things! Is she fantastic or what?

I heard a bit of dissension from my Top Chef crew last night about Carla’s abilities, credentials and whether she really deserves to be in the top 4, but ultimately I think she does, and here’s why: she’s learned. Carla had all these problems stemming from her inability to focus and her tendency to do too much, but she learned, and she fixed them! She realized, “this isn’t working,” so she went another direction: good, simple, great tasting food, and guess what? It hits the mark every time!

 

I hate when the cheftestants, like Hosea, make all this fuss about “Do I go all out? Do I go traditional? Hows my facial hair?” etc. Look, its not what you do that matters, its HOW you do it, and if you don’t get that by now, then you are going to lose. Make. good. food. that’s it.

Another stand out last night: my lover Fabio who, with total class and stick-to-it-iveness, made a whole meal with only 9 fingers, and he didn’t even flaunt his handi-capability to the table of Chefs when he introduced his dish. Now THAT takes restraint, seriously!! Bravo, Fabio! You deserve 2 of those HUGE bottles of wine.

Total shit-shows: Leah, Hosea and Padma. Leah, Hosea: go away. I’m so glad Leah finally went home, it only would have been better if she’d taken Hosea with her. Hosea – you suck. You think Stefan is your only competition and I predict that that will be your undoing. And Padma, were you um… cold?

YOWZA!

And maybe…um…STONED? C’mon! I get why you would partake of the herb before eating a HUGE delicious meal, but on on TV, Padma! Kids watch this show!

Best Padma line of the night: “Your two kinds of Spinach tasted like one kind of Spinach.” THANKS!

Anyway, I’m satisfied with the final four, and I’m excited to see what happens in New Orleans. Preview: GAIL RETURNS, Fabio expresses his new found love for the Sex Pistols, and Carla meets a hair straightener. GOOD TIMES! 

Poll:

A few Holiday gifts for you

As the holidays (and my Mexico vacation) near, I thought I would REGAIL you, blog readers, with some of my favorite Top Chef  bits from the web this week.

1) BRAVOTV.COM

The Top Chef page on Bravotv.com has an amazing amount of distracting crap to keep you procrastinating on those spreadsheets for your boss until well past your lunch hour. There’s the fantasy game (which I’ll comment more on below), the judge’s blogs (Gail this week) and the restaurant finder (great for New Yorkers with a little disposable income still available) with great suggestions by chef’s such as Wylie Dufrense, of WD-50 fame, and past Top Chef contestants.

2) Amuse-biatch.com

Amuse-biatch is mostly ok, but I’ll be DAMNED if I wasn’t blown away by the Top Chef contestant’s wives photos they’ve posted this week. Seriously, these men, Jeff, Hosea, Fabio, etc., have got some hot babe spouses. MILFs, if you will.  Check it out. It will rock you.

So, the big show is tonight and, of course, on my mind right now is my fantasy team. If you’ll remember, I rocked it last week with Stefan, Jamie and Hosea (I said Leah, but the website didn’t change my pick, so it was actually Hosea). But, despite my success, I think I’m gonna make one change this week.

The person I’m swapping? Jamie. Bitch, I can’t  STAND that bitch. I hate what a whiny sore loser she was last week. Honey, you’re not that surprised you haven’t been winning, you’re bitching about it because you know, deep down, that its no one’s fault but your own. Problem is: all you make is soup! Its pretty, yes, and tasty, probably, but honey, carrot puree isn’t gonna get you nowhere. Sorry.

Now, the know the argument has been made here on this blog’s comments that Jamie made the marinade for Ariane’s lamb last week and therefore should have won. Well, you know people, this isn’t TOP MARINADER, it’s TOP CHEF, and as we’ve learned many times, you have to COOK to win, and Jamie didn’t cook that lamb. Ariane did. Anyone with a tongue can put together a marinade that tastes good, but not just anybody can cook a piece of meat really nicely (yours truly included in that group, there). AND, Jamie didn’t even come up with the flavors in the marinade, RHADIKA DID! It was Indian food, Rhadi style! Jamie may have had the idea of saying, “oh, Indian food is NEW because its NEW to me,” but that doesn’t mean she created the flavors on the menu or cooked ANYTHING, which is why I’m trading her this week foooooooooooooooor…

 

Rhadika!

Yay! This girl has grown on me. Not only can she cook (she’s won a quickfire and an elimination challenge) but she’s got a quiet confidence about her which should not be overlooked. I think she’s gonna rock it this week. GO RHADI

Check back manana for some good ole fashion Top Chef post hashin.

Cheers!

-Allie